*sigh*

I really don't feel like being social.

I was offered a position as a Guide leader. They really need one, or else they will have to shut down the Guide unit of the Hut. But I went to the meeting last night, and the only thing I could do was panic. I didn't want to talk to people... I hate people at the best of times. Now the expect me to be the Guide leader. I feel really bad turning this down, but I'm going to have too. I've got my other volunteering things to do, and university. Fuck this, I feel so bad...

I guess I'll just text them. The other leaders have a way of skewing their words so you have to help out anyway like "Oh, we can work AROUND that" or "Sure you can't just do a couple of hours a week?". NO, FUCK OFF.

Yes, I am the self serving type, but only because when I'm not, I have to deal with people who guilt you into shit. It's better just to not care at all when it comes to certain organisations.

As for the Big Brother Big Sister thing, I'm still going ahead with that. The interviewer was really nice to me and they said I didn't have to go in a lift to get to their office... that I could take the stairs. But no Guides... they just made me feel like shit. I'm not even going to call, I'm just going to text them to tell them. Half the girls didn't like it there because their mothers were just forcing them into something for "extra curricular" activity. Fuck that, I NEVER did extra curricular activity and still managed to get myself into a good university. The other mothers just thought of us as glorified baby sitters.

Anyway, that's what my next post will be about... stupid fucking mothers.